I got accepted into UT... no surprisers there. Yea, I got a response like within 2 weeks of my sending my app. That's rather amusing considering some other people I know have been waiting for months. Oh, but I got wait listed for housing- not cool. Maybe I could pull some strings, hehehe...

Watched the State of the Union address. Man, I HATE how senators just looooove the standing applause. It takes up so much time. I mean seriously, you can't be that passionate about everything.

*Oh, and I sucked it up majorly on a stats test. Man, that one bad test grade drags down my average for the entire semester, GRRRR!!! And I was taking stats as a GPA booster too- sucks. In other news, my class rank is up to 12... but it's probably gonna drop again cuz of stats. *mutter-mutter* grrrr...

You know you're losing it when tearing off your eyelids doesn't seem like such a bad idea.

I'd been laying off on the caffeine for awhile, and I took my first strong hit of coffee in ages this afternoon. omg, I feel so crazy right now. I just want to run my head through a wall or something. Aggghhh, it's like someone's got a vacuum inside my brain. Arrggghhh... indescribable... agony!!!

I was thinking about those protein bars that I eat occasionally after kung fu. They love to make like a big deal of their 30g of protein or something. Well, I started thinking about it, and doing some ounce to gram number conversions, and I realized that 30g is roughly 1oz. What a jip! And here I was, thinking I was putting so much protein into my system, when it was the equivalent of like maybe 2 bites of steak. (an 8oz steak divided into 8 parts = about 2 bites, for me at least) Man, I feel so shafted, I don't think I'll ever buy one of those protein bars again- those things ain't cheap, ya know?

*After thinking about it some more, I realized that I forgot to factor in the moisture content of the steak. I was thinking a steak was like pure protein- d'oh! Maybe protein bars are worth more than I thought.

Man, I've got sooooooo much work to do over this weekend, but so much other stuff I'd rather do. *sigh* Do you ever wish that you could just fast forward in your life to after you've turned all your stuff in? Yea, that'd be sweeeeeeet.

*Oh yea, we were reading Locke's "Second Treatise on Government" for gov. class. He talked about how in the "natural state," people are equal but then they give up their power to join society with government. Well, I was reading it, and I remember thinking how people are so not naturally equal. It seemed reasonable to me that if you could beat up 2 people at once, you should have 2 votes in government or something like that. It seemed to make so much sense at the time. I mean, the strong obviously give up more power when joining society; shouldn't they get more back?

I was sick again today. Man, I really can't afford to be sick nowadays... too much stuff to make up. And man, I only have one more absence before I lose my exemption. Suckage!

Ow, I coughed so hard that I hurt my throat. =(

Went to Kent's bbq; ate like crazy. Watched part of City Hunter.

I went to the dentist this morning- got an X-ray and everything. He said one of my teeth is cracked, but it's not bad, and HOPEFULLY, it'll heal on its own... hopefully. No root damage though, that's good.

Bought a suit today. I'd been shopping for one awhile. It's not easy for me to buy a suit, cuz apparently my body's funny shaped or something (athletic fit). =P But yea, anyways, I ended up getting a 4-button jacket. I really prefer 3 buttons, but this one was extra cheap.

I had to perform for kung fu again tonight. It was for some kinda Vietnamese banquet of some sort. Man, I always feel out of place at the Vietnamese performances; at least at the Chinese ones, I understand what's being said, and usually recognize a few of the VIP's. Oh well, but anyways, Bee put together some new music for our kung fu show, which was really cool. It's about time! We'd been using the same music ever since I joined like almost 4 years ago.

After the performance, they took us to eat. On the ride back, we were packed into the van, and a few of people started singing and making stupid sound effects- practically trying to be annoying. It was just like, OMG, pleeeeeeease shut up! You're driving me crazy!

CRIKEY!!! My tooth nearly got knocked out! And my lower lip is swollen to about 2 times normal size. We were doing shuai jiao at martial arts club, and my head got thrown downwards, and it collided with my knee. It knocked my top front left tooth backwards. The funny thing is, at the time, it didn't hurt at all; I was like, "I'm fine. Bring it!" And they were like, "Dude, there's blood coming out of your mouth." I checked it out, and my tooth was tilted backwards about 30 degrees. I bent it forward, and it kinda snapped back into place & stayed. My lip feels like it's on fire- my teeth tore off a sizable portion of skin. Man, as I was walking, I could feel the extra mass of the swollen lip bobbing up and down. Uuugghh... I look like Bubba from Forrest Gump. DANG it! =(

Had to do community service for NHS this afternoon. It was like 4 hours worth. Plano West is hosting the local AcDec tournament this weekend, so we had to set up and stuff. Tiring. Boring.

*Oh, and we got this journal writing assignment in English today. We're supposed to write what happened to us like every 2 hours. Man, seriously, not that much cool stuff happens in the course of a day- especially not on an hour-to-hour basis. Oh well, we'll see what happens.

I'm reading 1984 for English. As usual, I've gotta have a significant portion of it read by early toorrow morning. Man, I'm actually starting to like this book, too bad I don't have the time to enjoy it. =/ I really sympathize with a lot of the themes and ideas brought up in the book, like the solitude and the feeling of being the only sane person in a world gone crazy. It's like these emotions that I could never put into words- I feel like I really connect with the protagonist on a deeper level.

Oh but, for some stupid reason, they're making us mark up and take notes in the book- I mean, I'd gotten in the habit of doing that anyway. But now that it's for a grade, I find myself marking passages for their "structural significance," and not just cuz I like the quote or the idea it expresses. Man, I think that effectively defeated the purpose of the assignment- by doing so, it makes reading an otherwise pleasurable book into a painful process. I mean, several years down the line, will it really matter who can intelligently discuss the literary devices used in a book, etc.? Isn't the point just to teach students how to appreciate a good book?

Yea, school seems to do a lot of things meaning well but that ends up harming students. For example, the whole thing with grades. They're meant to guage our understanding of material, no doubt. But when you toss in stuff like class ranks, trying to impress colleges, and trying not to fail- grades turn into a cut-throat competition to see who's the best. By inflating the importance of "academic superiority" they practically encourage cheating... and they wonder why they've got such a problem with "academic dishonesty." Pssshhh... open your eyes! But I mean, the way I see it, the purpose of school is to learn; a grade is just temporary & utterly meaningless in the end. I know it'd be impractical to do away with grades, but seriously, there's got to be a better way! =/

SICK DAY. Stomach hurt all of yesterday, and through this morning. Went to the doctor; he said it was a stomach flu and that there wasn't any medicine for it. =/ Went back to bed and slept until 2:00PM. Man, I'd hoped to get so much hw done while home from school. Well, I guess that didn't go quite as planned.

Man, we've got a new series of textbooks at Chinese school this year- omg!!! So freaking hard, hahaha. Oh, and on top of that, we're discontinuing the use of zhu-in (Taiwanese system) in favor of pinyin (Chinese system), Aaaggghhhh... WhyYyYyYy??? The teacher said it's cuz pinyin's more popular and more widely used. DANG it! Man, I tell ya, when Taiwan takes over the world... we'll see which country's system is more popular! =P

I had some egg nog tonight for the first time in ages. Funny, how I have to wait til after Christmas, when it's "on sale." =P But yea, man, that stuff'll kill you: a single cup has 50% of your day's saturated fat & cholesterol. That's probably also why it's so dang good! Hahaha... oh the bitter ironies of life. =/ And man, I bet companies think they're soooooooo clever when they make servings sizes like 1/4 of a cup, or like 2 chips, or like 1/20th of a candy bar- so it looks like there's less calories in it than there really are.

I watched Lis Miserables (the 1998 Liam Neeson/Claire Danes one) on cable this afternoon then took a nap right after. During the nap, I dreamed I was watching like some sort of Part II to the movie. That happens to me every so often: I watch a movie whose ending is so dissatisfying that I end up dreaming up a new ending to it. Seriously, that movie didn't end the way I remember Victor Hugo's book (the translated & abridged version, of course). But then again, I'm finding out that I've got no ability to remember the real plot of books I read when I was younger; the plot gets messed up and I only remember what my brain wants to (case in point: Fellowship of the Ring).

My brother left for college again today. I rushed home from kung fu to see if he'd still be here, but he was gone by the time I got back. =/ I dunno, I mean, I'm not too keen on goodbyes anyways (, I never know what to say), but it's like there's something about just being there when someone leaves, you know what I mean? You don't even have to say anything, just as long as you saw them at the last possible moment before they disappear for a long period of time.

Don't you just hate hearing recordings of your own voice? It's like, no way! I don't sound anything like that! We were recording our forms at kung fu tonight, and I happened to be talking during parts of it, and when we played it back, I was like, "Oh my gosh, was that me talking???" Seriously, I think I sound like Bullwinkle when I talk! I'm not kidding... GREAT... I've got the voice of a cartoon moose! =P

I was having this dream about potato chips, when I awoke (fully) to find myself stuffing this wadded-up half-used tissue in my mouth. Hahahahah, YUCK! It was like, hey, what the-? this doesn't taste like potato, what gives? Ummm, yea, people do the craziest things when they're half asleep, huh?

Do you ever have trouble just saying what you really think for fear of hurting other people's feelings... then end up digging yourself into deeper trouble with every word you say?

Man, first day back to school and I'm already avoiding hw. Haha, I get back in the groove fast!!! =P

Oh, how I fear the coming of tomorrow... Maaaaaaan, I don't wanna go back to school!!! =(

Man, I think watching that movie triggered some kind of catharsis or something. Well, I guess not so much of a "release" of any sort; it's like all these feelings of confusion and anxiety just hit me all at once. It's like I feel like crying, but can't isolate the reason for it. I want to think (, and it would seem that I am), but there's like this static in all my thoughts- I can't focus. My head just feels all muddled. Aggghhh... can't even express the way I feel, blehhhhhh... =(

I just watched A Beautiful Mind- it wasn't a bad movie, but I didn't like it. It made me feel confused and depressed after watching it. I guess I get depressed when I see/hear stories of geniuses going crazy. It's just, blehhhh... =( I hate stories about people's lives getting torn apart, and I hate it even more when that person's someone I'd like to be. =/ I guess I also don't like movies that make you doubt your own sanity. Auggghhh, brain hurts... so confused. Oh, and while I'm at it: I've got a thing against Russell Crowe, probably cuz Gladiator beat out Crouching Tiger, Hidden Dragon for Best Picture.

I went with a friend (among others) that I hadn't seen in ages. Kids from my old high school feed into 2 separate senior high schools, so a lot of my friends went to Plano Senior High instead of Plano West. Man, I have such a hard time just keeping up with my old (central) Plano friends in the same town, I wonder what it's gonna be like when everyone leaves for college. Saddening thought...

Oh, and we went to Java- how typical. Movie & java... that's like the stereotypical "outting" for me. =/

Other movies I've watched this break (mostly on VCD): Cowboy Bebop: Knocking on Heaven's Door, Ninja Scroll, the Princess Diaries

Man, I had already showered, but I decided to practice the new broadsword form again. Well, I started working up a sweat, and now I'm all sticky and stuff again. I hate when that happens: when you take an early shower, and by the time you wanna sleep, you need another shower.

Ugghhh... long kung fu day for me. Jason nagged me into taking a wushu broadsword workshop with him from Patty. Well, it's a cool form (old compulsory), but hard as hell. From a traditional (kung fu) standpoint, a lot of contemporary moves just don't make a whole lot of sense; the positions are such that they have little if any practical application- USELESS! I dunno, I doubt I'll be performing this form any time soon anyways. And I don't own a wushu broadsword either. =/

I was going to buy a drink after kung fu tonight, but there were these teenagers getting busted right in front of the 7-eleven I usually go to, so I decided to go to another gas station down the road. When I was checking out, the girl at the cash register told me I looked like Keanu Reeves, hahahaha. "Whoa!" =P I've also been told I look like Russell Wong- but I personally don't see the resemblance in either case. But I know there is this Taiwanese (or maybe HK) soap opera-ish actor that I look like though, named Oh Yang Long. I've seen a video with him in it, and I'll agree, we have the same silly looking smile.

Oh, and I clawed myself in the face tonight trying to do an open-hand block near my head. =/

Man, I was typing, and I paused to look down at the keyboard, and several keys are covered with blood. I look at my finger and realize it's bleeding again. Like the entire tip of that finger is numb, so I didn't even notice it spurting blood. Maaaaaaaan, now I gotta clean the keyboard or something.

My dad gave me the scraps of his presumed busted laptop to mess around with, and I finally got around to "playing" this afternoon. I found out that laptops aren't nearly as fun to dissect as desktops- not as many (if any) wires, too hard to tell what's going on. Well, anyways, after I had taken apart everything with screws in it, I got bored and decided trying to piece it back together again, kinda humpty-dumpy-like, I guess, haha. Well, anyways, I started fiddling around with "System Configuration," and it started working again, haha. I showed it to my dad, and now I think he's gonna keep it again, so we tried reassembling it for real. We found that it's a lot harder to put together again than to destroy. Umm, yea, we had like 10 screws and a couple pieces of metal & plastic left when we were "done," haha.

Me: man, do you ever just wish that the perfect girl would just casually wander into your life?
Anonymous: yea
Anonymous: i wish i had a girlfriend more than that
Me: well, the point being that this "perfect girl" would be willing to fill that position =P

I got my teeth cleaned today for the first time in awhile. Aaauuuggghhhhh... the pain!!! I've got bad gums, and the acne medicine that I just quit taking makes it worse. During the cleaning I swear, I could see the the liquid flow red through the sucky-straw thing. CRIKEY! Afterwards, when the dentist was like, "yea, you need to floss more, your gums were bleeding a lot," I politely replied, "haha, yea, that's sure what it felt like." But in my head, it was like omg, tell me something I DON'T know... Seriously, I think I'd rather stand and get punched several times than get my teeth cleaned again, hahaha... (forced half-laughter)

My kung fu school had an instructors (& assistant instructors) dinner tonight. Actually, it was more like a meeting than a dinner. Aaaaactually, it was more like a lecture than a meeting. Well, it gave me a little bit of insight into the way my Sifu thinks (; I often don't understand his actions and decisions- in terms of like motives and stuff). The "dinner" was really really long though; the whole thing took probably about 5 hours. Oh, and we took pictures too; we had to get all dressed up for it.

Well, last night was... interesting. For once, I didn't count down to the New Year by myself at home. Tony invited me to his church lock-in; now, granted I'm not Christian (, at least I don't think,) I was a little bit hesitant to accept his offer, but I was finally coaxed into it by promises of N64 and pizza, hahaha. Of course there was the obligatory prayin' and whatnot, blehhh- oh well, acceptable compromises, I suppose, heh. And I played Risk too, fun fun fun. But man, that's the first time I've ever pulled an all-nighter without even the slightest hint of caffeine, hahaha. What an accomplishment! =P

Oh, like right at the start of the night though, I was unfolding this chair and I sat down in it with my finger between 2 of the parts that eventually come together. OUCH!!! Man, it hurt like craAaAazy! It cracked my nail and bruised up my finger pretty badly. In my mind, I was just like, Give me Advil, or give me death! haha. It's like in those videos they showed us in tech class; the infinite words of wisdom still echo in my head: "Keep hands and limbs away from pinch points!" Maaaaan, now I'm gonna have like "foldy-chair-phobia." Like the first time I slammed a finger in a door, I was afraid to touch door hinges for years (, or, well, at least a really long time). And I was afraid to use that door of my house for a week+, I remember when it happened, I dropped the cheese stick I had in my hand, and it lay there outside on the ground for several days, reminding me of my pain and sadness... that poignant image remains in my mind to this day... =(

*And man, the darned thing won't stop bleeding! Aggghhh...