i looked at the moon tonight- i mean really looked. It's really beautiful. Man, i wish u could just stand there and look sometimes without having people give u strange looks and wonder what you're doing. Every day should be like the Mid Autumn Festival in China/Taiwan.

like whenever friends log on (to AIM) under their friend's SN, i never know whether or not to keep it on my buddy list or not; cuz it's like, chances are you're never gonna talk with them again, right? I guess i'll just keep 'em on until i reach the limit.

DAGGONE IT!!! i just remembered that there's no mail service on sundays!! crap! i was supposed to mail in the forms for the UT honors colloquium by... Sunday. CRAP! grrr... better hope they accept me anyways, that'd so suck if i didn't get to go cuz my forms got there 1 stinkin' day too late. grrrrr...

I wanted to go watch either A.I. or Pootie Tang, but that didn't work out, so i went and saw Atlantis as a kinda last minute thing. Not bad i guess- typical Disney fare (minus the singing and dancing and whatnot). Went to java again afterwards; i'm really starting to like these [margari-tea] things.

i hate when you're eating and someone "borrows" your napkin. (MOM!) *ahem* man, it's like if someone were to use your fork and then return it to you- it's just like no that's ok, you keep it. then you gotta go and get yourself another napkin (or fork, or whatever).

I just watched the part of Ferris Bueller's Day Off that i'd never watched before (the latter half). Am i a 'Cameron'- too afraid of everyday life to truly enjoy it?

Just got back from eating dim sum. Do all chinese families eat dim sum on the weekends? (like every weekend?) But man, I'm like incapable of eating dim sum without getting soy sauce on my shirt. You'd think after all these years i'd have learned not to wear white.

I had the best dream last night. No, not that kind of dream, you sickos! Just one of those where everything is... *sigh* ...perfect. It was one of those where after you've woken up, you spend the next couple hours desperately trying to get back to sleep and back into the dream- to no avail. Too bad we can't just live in one giant dream. =(

"When I close my eyes
just to see your face,
I wish this were real,
but I'm just dreamin'..."
~Rockell "In a Dream"

Another haiku, this one relates to something that happened some time around the end of last school year:

Closest confidante,
trusted her with my secrets.
stabbed me in the back.

Another uneventful day. Met up with some people I hadn't seen for awhile and had ice cream; they didn't have very much to say... Then we went to Java & Cha and played cards for a bit. We were like, "What do you wanna do?"; "I dunno, what do you wanna do?" for forever.
After probably like an hour or so, they come up with the bright idea to run to the mall for the sole purpose of surprising a friend of theirs who works there- so i decided to split. On the way home I stopped by McDonald's; Atlantis happy meals, pssshhhhh.... I don't want that. *sigh* ...boring.

I got home and watched the last part of Starship Troopers on FX! I thought it was an awesome movie; I dunno why the critics all said it sucked. Probably cuz the movie was 90% about killing bugs, huh? haha. Oh yea, and for some reason, the reception is particularly terrible for FX! I think it's the cable company's propaganda to make us wanna subscribe to digital. Hurt my eyes like crazy watching it, but oh well, haha.

Is it possible to have a tongue cramp? If it is, I think I just had one. aggghhh... the curse of pearls. owww- it hurts to talk or eat or anything! At least that apple margari-tea (or whatever it's called) was good while it lasted. =/

ARRGGG! Network adapter's acting up... so i can't get online with my brother's comp anymore until it's replaced. sooooo amazingly gay!!!

man, i've got this unfixable bump in the back of my hair! grrr... I thought I might just be sleeping funny or something, but it's not going away!! 3 days now...

i used my punching bag tonight for the first time in about a month. I couldn't use it before because it's outside and a bird decided to make a nest on top of it. And since i didn't wanna break the eggs inside or harm the baby birds, I decided to just not use the punching bag until they hatched and flew away. Well, they'd been gone for 2 days, so I decided to take down the nest and finally get some much needed exercise. This proved more difficult than i'd anticipated; when i shifted the nest a little, all this half-petrified bird poop fell out, it was sooooo nasty! So i had to get a broom and sweep like everywhere; it was a huge pain in the butt. Oh well, at least i spared the lives of 2 birds.

hey, wow, I never knew how cool (broadband) internet radio could be... now that I'm on a computer that doesn't crash like Kent Chao. ahahahahah (inside joke =P)

My brother's new Gateway computer arrived today while he's still at college orientation- so I'm taking it for a 'test drive', heheh. Internet still acts kinda funny though; maybe it's something about the server PC- errr... maybe this is just the way internet works, cuz it was like this when I had dial-up also. Still haven't run any super demanding programs yet, though. I haven't bought a game in ages. Oh well, I'm having a blast anyways.

It just occurred to me that within a span of less than 24 hours, two people just randomly messaged me and told me that I'm a jerk. Granted the first one was a mistake, it was still rather disconcerting. This wouldn't be the first time(s) I've been spontaneously called a jerk, either. hmmm.... maybe I am a jerk and just don't know it...

Played FF9 for about 2.5 hours tonight... until my playstation started overheating. Man, WHY DO THEY MAKE THE SUCCESS RATE OF STEALING SO FREAKING LOW!?!?!?! I spent 15 minutes straight trying to get a dang Fairy Flute. At about 3 turns per minute, I spent about 45 turns trying to get it. Then I got pissed and reset it, but then the game wouldn't load cuz the machine was too hot. arrrrgggg! i'm so mad!

Went to see O Brother, Where Art Thou? today. heheh, "50 cent tuesdays" come but once a week. Not bad, but it wasn't as similar to The Odyssey as I thought it'd be, but oh well; the high point of the movie was the scene with the cow! AHAHAHA!

And was that black guy the one from Diff'rent Strokes? "What you talkin' 'bout, Willis?" ahahaha. And John Goodman gives a whole new meaning to the phrase 'Bible beaters', hahaha. gotta give michael credit for thinking of that one, heheh.

Man, but at the theatre, I had a bag of candy and some popcorn. After the movie, I went to Java & Cha; then to visit a friend working at Chick-Fil-a, and you can't just go and not order anything, right? So I had an ice cream and some waffle fries, which pretty much filled me up. Then when I went home, my parents were still eating dinner, and not wanting to tell them I'd spoiled my appetite, I had to eat another meal. Ugghhhh... I'm sooooo full right now!

events from Stephen Sondheim's "Sweeney Todd":
Sweeney Todd is a barber who goes on a killing spree to revenge the brutal rape of his wife. Cannibalism was an afterthought added on by his enterprising new mistress, Mrs. Lovett, who runs a pie shop and can't stand to see all that good flesh left to rot in the grave. "Seems an awful waste," she warbles, "with the price of meat what it is, when you get it, if you get it." Soon the duo are grinding dead people into meat pies, and business couldn't be better.

hmmm... a most interesting business proposition, if u ask me, heheh

eating neopolitan ice cream. i know i really shouldn't- i'll get FAT! =P *sigh* the price of indulgence. you know, i hate it when you only get 2 out of the 3 flavors or when it all melts together and turns all funny-colored. and is it just me or does 'neopolitan' sound suspiciously similar to 'Napoleon'? hmmm... i wonder what neopolitan means anyways.

Do you ever have something happen in your dream right as you're waking up that seems absolutely hilarious, but a couple hours later when you're wide awake and thinking about it, it's not funny at all? Don't you just feel so stupid when that happens? i know i do.

man, people should all just chat right after school gets out... that way we wouldn't have to stay up so late on AIM, and maybe our sleeping patterns would be "normal" again.

kick-ups game
an extremely addicting internet game.
aaaggghhh! eyes hurt from not blinking! contacts getting dry...

on a high-note, I was cleaning my room today and I found a rough draft of a paper I wrote in the 9th grade. This was one of 3 really really good papers I wrote in all of high-school. The others were lost into the sands of time when my old computer's hard drive got fried. I think maybe I'll put the story up on my webpage sometime.

dang... spent the entire day waiting for the phone to ring. *sigh* she never called. =(

Another haiku:

Expecting her call,
Dreaming of hearing her voice;
The phone never rang.

"Who will hear the echoes
of stories never told?"
~Emiko Siratori "FF9 Theme song: Melodies of Life"

Here are some quotes from Batman Beyond that seemed fitting in my current dilemma:

Batman: Is there any time of day I get to have a social life?
Bruce: Not in this business.

Terry: I got this... afterschool job. Takes up a lot of my time. Too much.
Melanie: Maybe you should ask your boss for more time off.
Terry: Not this guy. Him you don't ask for time off.

man, i wanna be like those bards in the old days, where like everything that comes out of your mouth is in the form of a poem! =P

Another haiku:

"Don't sweat the small stuff;
Tomorrow the sun will rise,"
...or so we are told.

"Do good looking people earn more? Does it mean employers discriminate against ugly workers? Should the government offer affirmative action programs for ugly people?"
~(abridged) description for "The Economics of Beauty", a class session at the upcoming UT Honors Colloquium

I was in a haiku-writing mood today, here's my work:

From beautiful dreams
Awakening to silence,
One more lonely day...

Clouded destiny
No one knows until they die;
Victim to Fate's whims.

Life is one big sham.
A struggle to no avail-
What is it all for?

"Somehow to find a still spot in the noise
Was the frayed inner want, the winding, the frayed hope
Whose tatters he kept hunting through the din.
A satin peace somewhere.
A room of wily hush somewhere within.
* * *
He feared most of all the choices, that cried to be taken.

There were no bourns.
There were no quiet rooms."
~Gwendolyn Brooks "The Explorer"

"dry clean only" psssshhhhh... haha, what a lie! =P

man, my grandma just told me a story along the lines of:
"A scientist took his daughter on a safari once. On the way, they spotted a lion with her cubs approaching a slow-moving ox. The daughter pleaded, 'Daddy, Daddy, save the ox! Don't let it die!' The father responded, 'I can't do that. These things just have to run their course. Everything has to die sometime. And because the ox will die, the lion and her cubs will live; so you see, this is the way it has to be.' Having said this, they did not intervene, and thus the ox was killed."
What an ominous story to be telling me when she has cancer. I hope she did not intend that most obvious of possible symbolisms. =(

...which reminds me: "Why Is Wendy's Always on the Wrong Side of the Street?"
~the title of a class session at the upcoming UT Austin Honors Colloquium

It just occurred to me that the vast majority of the toilet paper dispensers in my house are located on the left side of the toilet. Hmmm... Considering that the greater portion of the world's population is right-handed, wouldn't the other side be the more logical choice of positioning? But alas, I am cursed to a life of reaching across my body for the instrument of rectal cleansing.

I'm a schizophrenic, the victim of a split-personality... A stark contrast exists between the 2 halves of my ego. One is shy, timid, quiet, and prone to sitting in the corner by himself... the ultimate follower. The other is dynamic, outspoken, and stands up for what he believes in... a natural leader. Which is the "me" that you know?

Man, AAAGGGHHH!!! I hate making improv phone calls (e.g. like getting the person when you expect the answering machine, or the answering machine when you expect the person). I get so nervous and don't know what to say! At least on AIM, people can't hear you getting nervous and stuttering... Darn me and my shaky voice under pressure!

I used to say "brang" a whole lot as a kid; it was quite a shock when I discovered that it wasn't a word.

I AM A MAH JONG MASTER!!! After 3 months of forfeited allowance, a visit from my grandparents, and a lucky night of gambling, I'm officially out of debt to my parents!!! =)

I once again find myself avoiding the inevitable...

Do people really mean it when they say, "Call me later"? Do they really want to hear from you, or are they just being polite? AGGHH... I'm racking my brains pondering the true meaning of 3 otherwise very simple words.

I'm addicted to the drug known as "napping". It's wasting away my life!!!

ARRRAGGGGHH!!! I pulled a "Mamei"- I grabbed for a person's hand thinking they wanted a handshake and then got hugged instead... A pleasant surprise, but those were the most awkward few seconds of off-center hugging in my life. =/

man, i was trying to walk through my kitchen in the dark and *BAM* i walk face first into the refrigerator! I managed not to scream out in agony and wake my parents though, I'm getting rather good at holding it in. But man, how do those blind people do it!?!?

DARN IT!!! Why do all good (non-compatible) opportunities seem to arise at exactly the same time?

"bye~"
(I like that ~squiggle~ , it reminds me of a person waving goodbye! heh, maybe it's just me)

"Now I see, if I wear a mask I can fool the world,
but I cannot fool my heart.
* * *
Why is my reflection someone I don't know?
Must I pretend that I'm
someone else for all time?
When will my reflection show
who I am inside?
* * *
Why must we all conceal
what we think, how we feel?
Must there be a secret me
I'm forced to hide?"
~Disney's Mulan (Christina Aguilera) "Reflection"

the minutes of my life slipping away like sand through an hourglass...

If these are the best days of our lives, OH MAN! am I scared of what's coming.

DANG!!! Why must there always be complications!?!?

*tick-tock* *tick-tock* the sound of life passing me by...

Another day another dollar- how drab. This is my life...